WrestleMania Remix: WrestleMania 27

In the lead-up to this year's WrestleMania, our plan is to do several "WrestleMania Remix" posts. Basically, this means we'll be mixing around the competitors in various WrestleManias to see if we can make better or more interesting shows.

Note that this is NOT "How WrestleMania should have been booked." We're changing every single match, regardless of whether or not the match itself was good or bad.

I've also set out a few rules for myself in doing this:
  • All competitors in every match must be changed (except for established tag teams).
    • This means that if a match is "Wrestler A vs Wrestler B" I can't change it "A vs B vs C" just to change the match. All competitors must be changed. That also goes for triple threats, fatal fourways, etc. I can't take one person out and call it a day. I need to change everyone.
    • However, a tag team counts as one unit as long as it was an established team and not one put together just for this event.
  • You can only move people around. You can't add or remove anyone from the card completely.
  • If the event used any special guest referees or celebrities in matches, they need to still be included in a similar position (i.e. if a celebrity wrestled, he or she still needs to wrestle. If a wrestler was a referee, he or she still needs to be one in another match)
  • There doesn't need to be the same number of matches on the remixed card (so two triple threat matches can become three singles matches, for example, as long as all the competitors have new opponents)
  • Titles can also be switched around so you can have different champions heading into the event. The same goes for the Royal Rumble winner.
  • I'm going to try to take people's place in the pecking order of the time into account. So someone who was a lower card wrestler at the time of the show can't just jump to the main event without some reasoning.
With that said, here we go with WrestleMania 27 Remix!

Here's the card as it went down:

United States Championship
Sheamus (c) vs. Daniel Bryan went to a no-contest

The Great Khali won at Battle Royal by last eliminating Sheamus

World Heavyweight Championship
Edge (c) (with Christian) defeated Alberto Del Rio (with Ricardo Rodriguez and Brodus Clay)

Cody Rhodes defeated Rey Mysterio

Kane, Big Show, Santino Marella and Kofi Kingston defeated The Corre (Wade Barrett, Ezekiel Jackson, Heath Slater and Justin Gabriel)

Randy Orton defeated CM Punk

Michael Cole (with Jack Swagger) defeated Jerry Lawler by disqualification  (Stone Cold Steve Austin as special guest referee)

The Undertaker defeated Triple H

John Morrison, Trish Stratus and Nicole Polizzi defeated Dolph Ziggler and LayCool (Michelle McCool and Layla) (with Vickie Guerrero)

WWE Championship
The Miz (c) (with Alex Riley) defeated John Cena

So, first of all, I'm not going to change the Battle Royal. It was on the pre-show and I'm not finding new places for everyone in the match. Sorry.

Second, I now realize that I have to find new matches for Michael Cole and Snookie, so I'm ready to quit this before I start. How were there only three title matches on the show (and one was on the pre-show) and yet those two have matches!? This show was bad.

*Deep breath* Okay.... here we go. Here is my card with explanations:


Daniel Bryan vs Kofi Kingston vs Dolph Ziggler
You want an exciting match for the pre-show/show opener. All three guys were over with the crowd and could put on a good match. For a storyline, have it be three guys who want to prove they can steal the show. Done.

World Heavyweight Championship
Edge (c) (with Christian) vs Cody Rhodes
If Edge is going to win (which he should, especially given his retirement the next day) he should at least elevate someone in the process. I'm changing the Royal Rumble winner (more on that later) so the storyline is that Cody Rhodes wins a tournament to earn a title shot. This could be a decent match.

Santino Marella and Trish Stratus vs Nicole Polizzi and Michael Cole (with Jack Swagger)
This is a joke and a huge waste of Trish Stratus, but there's not much else I could do.

Face it WWE, Nicole "Snookie" Polizzi is a heel and should have been booked as one. Basic storyline, Michael Cole is a jerk and he insults people. He insulted Santino. Santino insulted him back. Cole brought out Snookie to handle him and Santino brought out Trish. Is it bad? Yes it is.

Jerry Lawler vs LayCool (Michelle McCool and Layla) (with Vickie Guerrero) 
Oh what a terrible match. This WrestleMania sucked. Anyway, the storyline is that LayCool would spend some time being "Mean Girls" and insulting all of the women on the roster. Eventually,  Jerry Lawler would intervene and say that all of the women in WWE are beautiful and Vickie would set up the match.

I'd like to combine this match with the one above, but that would break my rules.

Randy Orton vs. The Miz (with Alex Riley)
The Miz cashed in on Orton to win the WWE title. Orton is upset and he costs Miz the title at Royal Rumble as revenge. That sets up this match.

Ezekiel Jackson vs Big Show
Both are big and Vince McMahon is running things, so....
This could be a good way to showcase Jackson as a powerhouse.

Kane vs Triple H
Triple H returns to WWE after a long absence and he's 2003 Triple H. He's a jerk and full of himself and he is back to win the Royal Rumble. He loses after he's eliminated by Kane. He then returns to the match with a sledgehammer and attacks Kane. The actual feud mentions their whole history with each other from Kane and DX to Katie Vick to Kane unmasking, etc. Triple H basically says Kane is a joke and an embarrassment to his half-brother The Undertaker. Kane counters that Triple H is a nothing compared to Shawn Michaels. If  done well, this could actually be a good feud that would have made Kane relevant for a bit.

United States Championship
Sheamus (c) vs. Alberto Del Rio (with Ricardo Rodriguez and Brodus Clay)
This sounds like something that could happen, right? The match would probably be okay.

Tag Team Championship
The Corre (Heath Slater and Justin Gabriel) (c) vs John Morrison and Rey Mysterio
I think Slater and Gabriel held the tag titles at this point, right? They could face Morrison and Mysterio because that team might be exciting. Have them win a battle royal or something to earn the shot.

The Undertaker vs Wade Barrett
The Undertaker would be used to elevate Barrett. Of course, Barrett would lose, but he'd put on a good match and that would help establish him as an upper card guy.

WWE Championship
CM Punk vs John Cena (c)
(Stone Cold Steve Austin as special guest referee)
This match should have happened at WrestleMania.

In my world, CM Punk would win the Royal Rumble and then go on a tirade against everyone. He'd challenge Cena and not only verbally insult Cena, but also continue his straight edge gimmick and insult the crowd, etc. Stone Cold Steve Austin would come out to confront him. ("There's nothing wrong with enjoying a few Steveweisers, Oh Hell Yeah!" etc.) and he'd end up becoming the special referee for the match. You could even include "Show Host" The Rock in some way.

Not only would this get us a John Cena/CM Punk main event, but it would allow us to have a brief Steve Austin versus CM Punk feud while The Rock could be The Rock and just take shots at everyone.

CM Punk would win and leave with the title. The next night, the Rock would insult Cena for losing, setting up their WrestleMania 28 match.

Overall, not a bad show. There are a lot of matches and the Snookie/Michael Cole/Jerry Lawler stuff would be awful, but I did what I could.

What do you think?

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