Top V Hockey and Pro Wrestling Moments Part II

Well, the first round of the NHL playoffs are done, and perhaps you're celebrating your team's win. Or your're angry at your team's first round exit. Or your're a Capitals fan and  you're just awaiting the inevitable embrace of death that occurs to your team in spring.

Whatever the case may be, it's time for Part two of our Top V Hockey and Wrestling moments. You can read part one here, and feel free to complain to me about my picks. I was a referee for 10 years. I can handle your criticism.

5. Dave Schultz: Referee

Let's be honest: if you were running a wrestling show in Philadelphia and wanted some cross-over promotion with legitimate athletes, Dave "The Hammer" Schultz would be at the top of your list. Or nearly every single Philadelphia Flyer who played for the team from 1973 to 2004.

With that in mind, Schultz was commissioned by WCW to referee the Nasty Boys / Kevin Sullivan & Catcus Jack tag-team battle at Slamboree in 1994.

The only online copy of the video I can find is via DailyMotion, but it begins with a competent promo from Schultz wherein he declares the match "will be by the rules" and that "the Hammer will be watching!"

Of course, it's a no rules match, so Schultz doesn't really do anything here -- save for interfering in the match and kicking the crap out of one of the Nasty Boys and doing a horrible 3-count.

This match took place not long before Cactus Jack would begin to appear more full-time in ECW (and not long before their re-branding as Extreme Championship Wrestling), so Mick Foley gets a number of good pops from the Philadelphia crowd here. Also of note: ECW super fan "Straw Hat Guy" John Bailey is in attendance at the Philadelphia Civic Center to watch the event.

4. CM Punk Gets Attacked by Bailey:
CM Punk is pretty much the singular reason I got back into professional wrestling in 2011 and 2012. Despite what you may think, I like his politics, and I admire any wrestler who tries to find a career path outside of the WWE, so I have a soft-spot for the guy.

Also, the best wrestling GIFs are CM Punk GIFs; don't @ me.

That said, I can't believe he let the Kings' mascot sneak up on him like this. I mean, keep your head on a swivel Punk. 

Mascots are the worst.

But I do love how Punk (I think) means to say "Marty McSorley" instead of "Luc Robitaille" when he's detailing how #99 let others fight for him. I mean I saw Luc Robitaille fight and it wasn't pretty. Way to botch Punk.

3. WWF Ice Hockey Shootout
I have so many questions.

As  you can tell by the commercial featuring "Mean" Gene Okerland, for a time in the early 1990s, the WWF / E produced a slot-hockey / table-hockey game featuring six heel and six face wrestlers. And for the record, here's the lineup:

"The Model" Rick Martel
Jake "The Snake" Roberts
Sgt. Slaughter
Mr. Perfect
Randy Savage
Jim Duggin
Million Dollar Man
Big Boss Man
Ultimate Warrior
Hulk Hogan

I've gotta say, that's not a good looking lineup. I mean Earthquake, Big Boss Man, and Tugboat? Not a lot of mobility there. I mean Randy Savage and Mr. Perfect would be good, but Sgt. Slaughter will be a Corsi nightmare.

And the fact that players dish the puck to Hogan in the ad is a clear allegory for WWF booking at the time.

But like most things associated with wrestling, my bigger question with this is "why?" I have this vision of a board meeting in Stamford where Vince is berating an employee when Shane enters the boardroom wearing a Whalers' jersey. Vince says "GOD DAMMIT, PUT HOGAN ON ICE -- THE KIDS WILL LOVE IT!"

In any event, I'm sure a lot of people lost their jobs over the failure of this toy. And now I'm sad.

2. Peter Taglianetti's Horrible Promo
A couple weeks ago, I wrote about the bizarre Stars and Stripes Body-Slam Challenge in 1993 where professional atheltes and various WWF Superstars attempted to body-slam Yokozuna on the USS Intrepid. The NHL's contribution to this event was former Penguin and Jet tough-guy defenseman Peter Taglianetti. Like most of the athletes, his attempt to body-slam Yokozuna was pretty futile, but I wanted to instead focus on his promo -- which begins at the 1:45 mark in the video above.

Have you watched it? Did you miss it? It's short.

I don't understand why Taglianetti uses the word "athlete" instead of the proper plural "athletes." Is this a regionalism I'm not aware of? Is this a WWE-penned dig at French Canadians? Am I overthinking this?

I'd also like to point out that Taglianetti declares that Yokozuna might be "as big as a horse, but smells like a camel." On the one hand, this seems like an odd insult. On the other, I cannot help but wonder if this "insult" is a carryover from Gulf War-era American rhetoric -- which will still can see today -- wherein speakers use stereotypical images of the Middle East (Southwest Asia is more accurate and less Euro-centric) to "other" anyone who appears to be "non-American." In this case, an American "others" a Japanese character (portrayed by a Samoan American man) by equating him with Middle East attributes.

Again, I might be overthinking this. But I like my analysis nonetheless.

Also, Taglianetti first appeared in the NHL with the Winnipeg Jets under John Ferguson's watch, so maybe Ferguson gave Taglianetti a few pro wrestling pointers?

1. Mr Perfect and Mike Modano 
Could it be anything else? It has to be Curt Henning's goal-tending.

In the early 1990s, Mr. Perfect (RIP) appeared in a series of vignettes where he would excel at golf, baseball, basketball, etc. and do them perfectly. In this clip, he stars with a very young Mike Modano, tending goal of the "Minnesota North Stars" (I guess they couldn't clear the trademark of the North Stars, hence the template unis?) and he keeps every shot away with the skill we'd expect from one of the best wrestlers of all time.

Also of note: Modano's voice is so high-pitched here, it's charming.

Also of note: my daughter wants to be a goalie, and she loves this clip.

The less said about this clip, the better because it's fantastic.

So that's it! Our second Top V moments where hockey and wrestling intersected. Did we miss any? Let us know in the comments or via Twitter or Facebook. And go Preds!

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